So, yesterday I met with a friend/mentor/spiritual mother for a nice long chat about my numerous insecurities. It went really well and I'll be putting some of her suggestions to use today!
She did, however, say something that bothered me a little. We were talking about my desire for children and she told me to have patience and not "arm-twist God". She said maybe God thinks I'm not ready yet, but if I continue to "arm-twist" Him, He'll give me a baby even if I'm not ready. I know she means well, but is this really how God works? I thought He would only allow us to get pregnant if it were His will...
In other news, last night and all morning I've been getting weird prickly feelings all over my body. It's kind of freaking me out...does anybody know what that could be? Also, my husband starts his new job today, so please pray for him! :)
Happy Solemnity of All Saints! As Mother Assumpta Long, O.P. says, this should be our feast day someday! :)
As for what your friend said, I completely disagree. You are right, if we are pregnant it is
ReplyDeleteGod's will.
Someone who gets pregnant out of wedlock or uses IVF is twisting God's arm so to speak. However, He gave us free will, and He will honor the procreative process even if it doesn't happen in the way He designed it.
However, once that life comes into being, that person is a perfect eternal soul who is faultless and loved in the eyes of God regardless of the sinful circumstances of their conception.
Does that make sense?
That totally makes sense! That's exactly what I was thinking! She also doesn't agree with taking fertility meds such as clomid because she feels like it's forcing things...
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry I haven't been good about reading your posts! I'm late, but I had to comment on this one.
ReplyDeleteI think your friend is waaaay off the mark on that one. First, God isn't holding out on you because you are "not ready yet." That is insulting. You growing more, praying better, or learning more about infant care (as some random examples) isn't going to convince God to bless you with a child. We don't earn gifts, that is why they are gifts.
People who use IVF are actually "arm-twisting" God; they are using the nature that He created to do something that is outside of His Holy Will. When a child is conceived in this way, it would be part of God's "permissive will" not His Perfect Will. He allows it because of our freedom. Of course, there is no need for me to elaborate on how this has no effect on the dignity of the child; we all know that. :)
The Church sees no problem in medication that aids in the natural processes of procreation. Corrective surgeries, hormones, medications and the timing of intercourse are all fair game. To think otherwise hints of Providentialism; perhaps she should never have medication for any ailment that she herself encounters... It's not wrong to go about things that way, of course, but it's not right to direct someone else to do the same as if to write off all modern medicine as sinful.